Why we're losing the potato competiton

[Bob D]

Baking potatoes the automotive industry way:

How a Honda employee bakes a potato:

Preheat new, high-quality oven to 350 F. Insert Idaho potato. Go do

something productive for 45 minutes. Check for doneness, and then remove

perfectly baked potato from oven and serve.

How a GM employee bakes a potato:

Instruct an Idaho potato supplier to preheat the oven to 350 F. Demand

that the supplier show you how he turned the dial to reach 350F, and have him

come up with documentation from the oven manufacturer proving that it was

calibrated properly. Review documentation, then have supplier check the

temperature using sophisticated temperature probe. Direct supplier to

insert potato and set timer for 45 minutes. Have supplier open oven to

prove potato has been installed correctly, and request a free study proving that

45 minutes is the ideal time to bake a potato of this size.

Check potato for doneness after 10 minutes.

Check potato for doneness after 11 minutes.

Check potato for doneness after 12 minutes.

Become impatient with supplier (why is this simple potato taking so long

to bake?). Demand status reports every five minutes. Check p! otato fo r

doneness after 15 minutes... After 35 minutes, conclude that potato is nearing

completion. Congratulate supplier, and then update your boss on all the

great work you've done, despite having to work with such an uncooperative

supplier. Remove potato from oven after 40 minutes of baking, as a cost

savings; without loss of function or quality versus the original 45 minute

baking time. Serve potato.

Wonder aloud what on earth those Japanese folks are doing over there to

make such good low-cost baked potatoes that people seem to like better than GM

potatoes.

Daimler Chrysler's Baked Potatoes:

Design great looking potato. Include sour cream, bacon bits, chives, and

cheese. Bean counters then create MCM system. Engineers spend 2 years

looking for ways to take out sour cream, bacon bits, chives, and cheese.

Engineers find cheap imitation chives from Japanese supplier. Management

commands engineers to use expensive, over-engineered German bacon bits to

help prop up weak German suppliers. Sell potato with cheap imitation

chives, no sour cream, cheese or expensive German bacon bits. Potato rots so fast

customer swears never to buy another DCX potato.

Ford's Baked Potatoes:

Engineers create plain looking, "everyman" potato. Sold as "green"

alternative to French Fries. When micro waved, potato explodes, causing

death and injury to customers and bringing end to 100-year potato and

butter-supplier relationship, Lawyers flourish.

[Marika]

[Scotty]

Very funny, but so true!

[Willie Hank]

Excellent!!!

I sent this to everyone on our executive staff. Interestingly, at our annual offsite business planning meeting recently, he started the meeting off with how a fellow business partner traded in his Mercedes for a Lexus, because of quality and service issues on the former. Not totally relevant, but he will get a kick out of this.

[JohnnyG]

Instruct an Idaho potato supplier to preheat the oven to 350 F. Demand

that the supplier show you how he turned the dial to reach 350F, and have him

come up with documentation from the oven manufacturer proving that it was

calibrated properly. Review documentation, then have supplier check the

temperature using sophisticated temperature probe. Direct supplier to

insert potato and set timer for 45 minutes. Have supplier open oven to

prove potato has been installed correctly, and request a free study proving that

45 minutes is the ideal time to bake a potato of this size.

Check potato for doneness after 10 minutes.

You left out the part where the auditors come in (consultants of course, we don't have that kind of expertise) to verify the SYSTEM USED to ensure that the dial was correctly turned to the required position.

In the end, GM will get "The Presidents Award" which is another term for "economic recovery plan".

[DADCAD]

Instruct an Idaho potato supplier to preheat the oven to 350 F. Demand

that the supplier show you how he turned the dial to reach 350F, and have him

come up with documentation from the oven manufacturer proving that it was

calibrated properly. Review documentation, then have supplier check the

temperature using sophisticated temperature probe. Direct supplier to

insert potato and set timer for 45 minutes. Have supplier open oven to

prove potato has been installed correctly, and request a free study proving that

45 minutes is the ideal time to bake a potato of this size.

Check potato for doneness after 10 minutes.

You left out the part where the auditors come in (consultants of course, we don't have that kind of expertise) to verify the SYSTEM USED to ensure that the dial was correctly turned to the required position.

In the end, GM will get "The Presidents Award" which is another term for "economic recovery plan".

Well... After working for a G.M. supplier for several years (Cloyes Gear Company), that is closer to the truth than not...G.M. did want it their way...

Funny, nun the less

P.S. We will need a capability study of potato's..to ensure the repeatability is acheive and maintainable throughout the production process. Then and only then will we initiate production...We will then need an Automated Computerized Potato Check Machine to ensure spec's are maintained, eliminating potential human error. Any substandard potato can result in assy line shut down...these cost's...(approx $1500.00 per min.) can and will be absorbed by the supplier. In addition to these cost's the supplier will then hire an outside agency( at their cost) to re-check each potato...This will insure no bad potato's will reach the assy line...Oh yes...When the outside agency let's a bad potato through...put the Supplier on "New Business Hold" preventing any bid's for new contract's being placed and ensuring layoff's for the small town supplier...OOP's am I ranting????